Having lived in three countries and six cities, I’ve met a great number of people from a variety of cultures. I’ve had different friends, business partners, mentors, girlfriends, and was even married. Some of them have had an extraordinary influence on my life and some made me rethink the type of relationships I want to attract.
And this is what I learned from it.
When I reflect upon my overall personal and financial progress, I see how my results are directly correlated with the type of people I spend time with.
In my early 20’s, I was experimenting with different business ideas. I was also struggling with my finances. Although I didn’t mind it too much, it was no surprise to find out my friends were facing similar challenges.
Soon, I decided to change things around.
After moving to London I had my first business breakthrough. But before I started making money as an entrepreneur, I did lots of networking. I upgraded my social environment to a whole new level. And there was a reason for that – I wanted to surround myself with successful people so badly that I sacrificed sleep so I could spend more time networking and finding business opportunities.
My relentless attitude helped me connect with industry leaders, millionaires, bestselling authors, and just great people. And this is when I started to realise that there is so much more to life. Beliefs about what’s possible to achieve began to shift. I felt like I could finally breathe normally and that the environment suited my ambitions and unconscious desires.
It was a real transformation for me.
I learned that the quality of our lives significantly depends who we choose to surround ourselves with.
You become who you surround yourself with
As much it’s a cliché, it also became common sense to me.
You see, we somewhat depend and rely on each other. It’s a no-brainer that we are influenced by those who we’re most connected with. I have friends who I really trust and can approach for anything I need. I know that our relationships have been proven to create positive changes in my life. I don’t hesitate to ask them for their perspective on almost anything.
People shape your thinking, standards, beliefs, and your financial thermostat. To determine whether the quality of your life is good enough for you, look around at the people you are surrounded with.
Take a piece of paper and draw two columns. In the first column, write the names of the people you hang out with, do business with, sleep with, go for a lunch with, take coffee breaks with, and generally spend time with. In the second column, put the following characters next to each name: put + (plus) if this person adds positive value to your life; put 0 (zero) if this person doesn’t make any difference to your life; and put – (minus) if this person takes from you more than gives to you.
This is a simple exercise but it’s the first step to upgrading your social environment. Now imagine yourself being a part of a group of friends who are a few steps ahead of you. Are they multi-millionaires, best-selling authors, or just positive people?
But it doesn’t just end with your close friends and peers. Connecting with mentors and coaches is proven to be one the most powerful things you can do in order to grow yourself and your business. Anyone who’s reached the top level of their industry will tell you that they got there with lots of help.
So, who do you want to surround yourself with?
Chose those who are stronger than you
Most of us often fall into a comfort zone of hanging out with ‘ok’ people. These people don’t challenge you, don’t call you out on things that might improve your life, or even can’t be fully honest with you. But what will help us become rich is being around strong people. Not just financially but also mentally, physically, and spiritually.
According to a 2013 psychological study, people with low self-control can overcome temptations better if surrounded by people with higher self-control. The researchers also found that the participants who depleted their self-control preferred to rely on those who were mentally stronger.
Here, the takeaway is to understand that support, provided by stronger peers, is vital for our development. In mentorship, for example, a relationship dynamic becomes very resourceful and even inspiring when you allow yourself to open up to learning new things.
Unfortunately, many people don’t fully understand the value of such relationships. The most common reason for that is a vulnerability. We simply don’t want to be sincere and authentic with other people. And this is because we still hold on to emotional baggage which we picked up a long time ago.
To gain empowerment from others, you need to let it all go, my friend.
Build meaningful relationships and make deep connections. That’s how you will enrich your life from within. It will be one of the most abundant gifts you give to yourself.
Who can make you rich?
Well, the only person who can do it is you. I’m sure that, by now, you’ve realised that this article takes you beyond just financial success. My whole point is to help you realise that you make your environment. And it starts with you. You choose what to think, what to eat, where to go, and with whom to sleep with. It’s not more complicated than that. But somehow the majority of us miss this very simple, yet fundamental thought.
What do you think about this?
I personally believe that to become truly rich, we need to create an abundant environment. And we start creating that place inside of us. To get among rich people, we first need to have a rich mindset. The great news is, we are 100% in control of this process.
Which one suits your needs:
- a) Talk to three random strangers a day
- b) Go to three high-profile (business) networking events a week.
- c) Join a mastermind with people who earn at least four-to-five times more than you do, or be around people who do what you want to do, at the level where you want to be.
- d) Find a great mentor or coach who will kick your ass.